Vote Roast Beef on European election day!
The European elections are looming. Having looked at some of the manifesto of some of the candidates in our neck of the woods, I feel inclined to outline my own idea for a political party.
The elections take place on June 4 and the parties planning to field candidates include the usual suspects. Plus, there are some
additional chancers, one-policy wonders and borderline loonies also chucking their hats in the ring.
However, all parties listed as planning to field candidates seem to carry some form of baggage, so with that in mind, I hereby outline my plans for the Roast Beef Party…
Obviously, given the name of this new and radical political offering, membership and support will entail a weekly Sunday lunchtime ritual
of roasting a decent cut of cow, obtained from your local butcher
or farm shop, serving with the traditional accompaniments of Yorkshire Pudding and horseradish or mustard sauce.
This would be naturally swilled down with decent English ale or an Elderflower based cordial.
Other Roast Beef Party requirements include regular reading of Private Eye magazine (satire being a delicious English trait) and the driving of an English motor such as a Morris Minor or something manufactured by Triumph.
The national day celebrating the English way of life, according to
the Roast Beef Party, will fall on November 30.
The Roast Beef Party will happily ignore St George's Day, which has been hijacked by certain political parties and tabloid newspapers.
So many surveys have been commissioned asking folk if they want St George's Day to be a public holiday and of course the answer is a resounding 'Yes'!
But don't be fooled into believing this has anything to do with
patriotism.
No, it has everything to do with blagging a day off work.
True patriots will realise November 30 is the birthday of Sir Winston Churchill, without doubt one of the greatest Englishman ever.
And for fans of St George well, get over it. He is also the patron saint of Ethiopia and Greece, among others, and is believed to hail from Turkey.
Nothing wrong with that, but let's acknowledge a truly great Englishman in order to celebrate being English.
Obviously to turn my political proposal into reality would require significant funding, which means, alas, that it will have to remain
an ideal.
But in this climate of voter apathy and gripers bemoaning that they feel no one party properly reflects their views, would you vote for the Roast Beef Party?
Perhaps you can suggest some additional policies to my fantasy manifesto?
In the meantime, I am off to Chichester's Penfold's butcher to order a decent rib of beef.
*Music fans take note.
Next Monday, May 11, sees a real legend take to the stage of
the Alexandra Theatre in Bognor Regis at 8pm.
Charlie Watts, drummer with The Rolling Stones, will be performing along with Axel Zwingenberger, Ben Waters and special guests.
My advice is to call 01243 861010 and book your ticket to avoid
disappointment.
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Weather for Chichester
Wednesday 30 May 2012
Today
Sunny spells
Temperature: 12 C to 20 C
Wind Speed: 21 mph
Wind direction: South west
Tomorrow
Cloudy
Temperature: 13 C to 19 C
Wind Speed: 25 mph
Wind direction: West
