Talking Sport: England to win World Cup? Don't make me laugh

If you believe a team of 11 men who are hardly renowned for their intellectual prowess, then it seems England are within a sniff of winning next year's World Cup. Ah, I do like people with a sense of humour.

Even the bookies are getting carried away and acting the giddy goat, offering 8/1, or thereabouts, for a team who haven't won so much as a solitary carrot for nigh on half a century.

But, as the saying goes, there's one born every minute, and the coming months will see mugs galore placing a few bob on the chaps to return home victorious.

If memory serves me right, I've probably seen England play well on two, yes two, occasions in the past 13 years: demolishing the Dutch in '96, and ripping to shreds the Germans in a pointless friendly, a mere five years later.

And by playing well, I mean consistently good football for 90 minutes, not 75 minutes, then dozing off for the remaining 15.

But the tabloids, pundits, internet forum users, and even women, think England can actually win.

But to do so England need a world class goalkeeper. The cupboard is bare. They also need a defence that doesn't have the tendency to disappear '“ Rio Ferdinand anyone? The camel-mouthed stroller is notorious for slipping on the smoking jacket and whipping out the cognac and cigars at any given moment during a game.

Part of the problem is we expect too much. Combine it with the fact that England really aren't that good, then best put a few quid on them getting the plane home after the quarters. You know it makes sense.

*******

He's 'Fab Cap', according to The Sun. Good old Fabio can't put a foot wrong at the moment, and what do you expect, after his band of marauding invaders demolished the genius of Andorra, Kazakhstan, and Belarus?

But I wonder how long this particular honeymoon will last?

Half of the time we haven't a clue what he's saying, we smile when he smiles, we laugh when he laughs. He's a bit like Grange Hill's Mr Bronson in that everyone is too scared to lay the verbal boot in.

But surely it can only be a matter of time? After all, it's happened to every other England boss'¦..

Robson was vilified so much that he seemed to have aged by each passing game, Taylor was referred to as a 'turnip', Hoddle was described as a God-bothering crackpot, Sven was too busy with the birds to care about the footy, and McClaren was the 'wally with the brolly' '“ mind you, I'd have thought him being a ginger would have been a more cause for concern.

So, I wonder what the future holds for Mr Capello? From 'Fab Cap' to 'Andy Capp', perhaps?

What do you think? Is Neil spot-on? Or is he talking rubbish? Email us your view and we will publish it on this page.