What does Bognor Regis have to offer?

Bognor Regis is like a clapped-out old banger, he said.

Councillors Brooks and Brown suggest he comes to view the delights of our town on offer.

A new £40m school, that will fit nicely in a holiday brochure, and of course Butlin’s.

That’s it, folks, that’s all they can offer Councillor Baldwin to change his mind about Bognor town, unless he is a fan of charity or phone shops, in which case he will go into raptures of happiness.

They didn’t mention half a pier or all the other nothings to do.

Like an old banger, the town could be restored.

All it needs are councillors with the ability and drive to achieve, an attribute that appears lacking.

If councillor Baldwin does come, will councillors Brooks and Brown please make sure that he crosses the High Street at the junction with London Road safely.

Watch out for the illegal cars coming through: we would hate him to compare Bognor to Goodwood race track.

So come on councillors, explain again the delights of Bognor Regis that encourage the visitor to part with their money for the good of our economy.

Mr A Blackburn,

Stoney Stile Close, Bognor Regis